Maptek T-Bones:
6
Conundrums:
9
Attendance (Game):
0
Attendance
(YTD): 3.5
Well Done!
Conundrums Burn T-Bones, Savor Taste of Victory
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| Ryan Wilcoxen accepts weekly TWIX award due to Brandon Casey's refusal to be photographed with Interim Coach Emmot |
LAKEWOOD, CO (TP) – The
Conundrums picked up their second consecutive victory Monday night at Lakewood Park, besting longtime rivals Maptek 9-6 in a defensive thriller.
The Conundrums never trailed in the match, jumping out to an early lead on the back of Brandon Casey's thunderstick. Maptek made the game interesting in the top of the 7th inning, loading the bases and scoring three runs. But their rally would prove to be too little, too late, as the Puzzlers turned up the heat to escape the inning, and lay claim to their second win of the season.
Fan Club: Randy "Rand Man" Dickman's giggling fangirls were out in full force, snapping photos and hobnobbing with the team's starting pitcher during pregame warm-ups. Team management promises tighter security saying, "We take these intrusions seriously. We can't have people snapping unauthorized photos of our pregame training techniques. These people clearly haven't learned any lessons from Bill Belichick's mistakes."
It's a Jungle Out There: Team management expressed concerns surrounding "excessive outfield grass length" to the league office on Monday night. According to sources, the outfield has not been mowed for 27 consecutive days due to a combination of increasing fuel prices, tight labor market, budget shortages, incompetent managment, ongoing litgation over "ownership rights to the grass" with Monsanto, and 27 consecutive days of rain.
Conundrums outfielders utilzied tracking dogs, radar, sonar, advance scouts, and GPS technology to track down balls hit beyond the reach of the team's infielders.
League officials, citing Diplomatic Immunity, refused to comment on the situation, leaving teams to speculate on how things could have gone so wrong. The players association has enlisted the support of the F.O.P. Dawgs to conduct a full investigation into the matter.
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| Conundrums Outfielder Dave Brubaker attempts to locate a ball hit to shallow centerfield |
Next Game: June 9th vs Rebels. First pitch scheduled for 6:15p
